VICTORIES!

Chance forced me to go shopping today....you see, his company Christmas party is on Saturday night....yay. I dread shopping, it's like the plague or something...I feel like everyone stares at me and is judging everything I pick up. I am still (in my head) the almost 300lb girl shopping at stores she shouldn't even be in. But you see, I'm a lot smaller, I just forget that I am. So I went into Forever21. wow. First of all, that place is ginormous! SO SO overwhelming. I needed my psychologist right then and there...I honestly could have called him and had him walk me through this....totally ridiculous...lol...but the truth. I kind of just did a beeline for the front doors...I wanted out...immediately. I always thought that when I lost enough weight to shop in all the stores, that I'd be jumping for joy, but in all actuality, it's super overwhelming for me! How do people pick out clothes!? SO many damn options! I don't know if any of you skinny people know this, but us big girls have 2 stores to shop at for the most part and the other stores have a plus size section, that's about the size of my ass and completely separate from the rest of the store....like JCPenny's for instance...there plus size is on the second floor.....nice. assholes. Anywho---stepping off of soapbox now...lol...back to my original thought...too many options...I need someone to hold my hand and take me shopping...I determined today that I have NO fashion sense...so sad to admit it, but it's the truth! I need to find myself in the fashion world. so I'm recruiting my dear friend Kaley. Forgive me in advance girl! It's gonna be tough! LOL

So the exciting news! I bought a dress in a size...........12!!!!!!! HOLY CRAP! That's right! A 12. I haven't been a 12 since like 8th grade. Seriously...wow.

I feel beautiful again....Even made a trip into Frederick's today! Chance is excited for that...lol

Thanks for reading my ramblings...I love and appreciate all of your support more than you guys know!

just some thoughts....

Thanksgiving was last week. It went surprisingly well. It was probably the hardest thing I've had to do yet. All that delicious food and my teeny tiny tummy wasn't exactly the best combination. But I just kept reminding myself of how far I've come. I had a drink or two and enjoyed a great meal with my little family and my best friend. It was probably one of the nicest and most relaxed Thanksgivings we've had in a while.

I weighed in again this morning and I weighed in at 204.4! Nice start to my day ;)

We got our Christmas tree in last night! It's a 9.5' prelit SILVER pencil pine. It's SO beautiful!!! I've always wanted a silver Christmas tree and Chance made that dream come true this year! We decorated it last night and it's all lit up as I type.



I know I always talk about how blessed I am, and I sometimes don't think I deserve all of the love I receive. Chance is the greatest man I have ever known. He supports me on my super bad days and holds me up when I know that I can't possibly go on anymore. He tells me how beautiful I am daily almost hourly...lol...and he tells me when to pull my head out of my ass as well. He loved me when I was big and beautiful and he loves me in my smaller frame as well. I have the craziest days and he just sits in the floor and holds me when I cry or laughs at me when needed...lol He loves our kids in a way I didn't think it was possible for a man....he does everything for them and me. I guess I just needed to write all this out, in short, he's amazing. I'm thankful for him. My therapist says that an addict will transfer addictions. I had a tryst with pills and almost did a nose dive into alcohol....but my better judgment and urge to not do anything harmful to my body and my family kept me from doing that nasty stuff. So I think that my new addiction is Chance. I personally think that's a pretty good addiction ;)

Oops....

SW: 281.8
CW: 205.2

So.......its been a while....I have been so stinkin busy between school and just life in general that I totally forgot to update! I have been pretty stalled in my weight loss. Since Nov 3rd, I've lost 4.4 lbs. I feel super great, all the meds are working and I've been doing lots better on remembering my vitamins. My protein intake is down....damn holidays and my sugar intake is up....oops. I've done lots better this past weekend, so we'll see what happens. I'm still losing inches, just not pounds...but to be totally honest, I don't care. I feel great and I think I look pretty great :) I'm cleared to go back to working out again, so I think I'll try that out before too long :) I bet my weight will go up then, but that's cool if I can get some definition back!

Have a great week everyone!

5 months....

My surgery was on June 6th and now it's November 6th.... In that time, I have lost 72.6 lbs and I feel fantastic. We did measurements this morning, so here ya go:

L upper arm: +1/4"

R upper arm: +1/4"

Chest: - 2.5"

Waist: -4"

Hips: -2.25"

L thigh: -1.25"

R thigh: -1.25"

L calf: -1.5"

R calf: -1.5"

Neck: -0-

WOW! I'll take the plus in my arms, mainly because I've been working on them....so I'll take it...lol.

A lot of people have asked what my total change has been from day one, so here are those numbers

Wrist: -1/4"

Arms: -3"

Chest: -6"

Waist: -9"

Hips: -13.75"

Thighs: -5"

Calf: -1"

Dress size: 24 down to 14

Shirt size: 22/24 down to 14/16

Bra size: 42H down to 38DDD

Ring size: 9 down to 7

Shoe size: 9.5 down to 8.5

Neck: -1.25"

So....yeah....I've changed a lot.....I still can't believe it....but I'll take it!

Day before surgery

Today :)

lots of coolness....

Today was an excellent day....I skipped school and spent the day with my love. I needed that. My Daddy left yesterday and I was a bit down....so this cheered me up a bit :) We went to Old Navy and I bought size 14 jeans.......HOLY HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can even squeeze (very uncomfortably) into a size 12. But I decided that wouldn't be a good idea...I don't like muffin tops, so I'll just buy 2 pairs of jeans and then in another month, we'll go buy two more pairs.

Another cool thing....Chance bought me some boots. Two pairs...one pair is brown and they resemble loose cowboy boots....CUTE! Then the other pair, go all the way up to my knees.......I will repeat that....lol....to my knees. I haven't been able to get a pair of boots over my calves in years....and now I can....which is odd, seeing as how my calves have gotten bigger....but whatever...I'll take it! They're super cute and I even bought a pair of skinny jeans to wear with them.....so all in all....GREAT DAY!

Have a good weekend everyone!

Milestone....

I hit 209.6 today....I officially weigh less than my husband. I haven't weighed less than Chance since I was a sophomore in high school....how cool is that!? It's a really great feeling....I'm feeling good and looking good :) Life is gooood....