NSV!!

I did a 12 minute mile this morning!! YAY ME!! I usually take 15 minutes...but not today!

I'm feeling really good...I've been eating like crap though....I did really well yesterday...I let Dr.Pepper in...and now I'm trying to kick him out again....I love that stuff...My doctor said one a day won't kill me...but I know me...one will turn into 2...3...4...etc. And I don't want that. So I figure if I treat it like sweets I'll be ok....every once in a while.

Things at the salon are going good. It has been a slow week, but that's alright...I've made enough to cover booth rent and at this point, that's really all I care about :) I really love what I do.

I've been working more on the emotional sides of things. I'm sick of looking in the mirror and still seeing that 300lb fat girl...I would really like to start seeing what everyone else sees. I was cutting hair yesterday and I caught a glimpse of her. It was crazy and mildly surreal. My client asked if everything was alright...cause I'm pretty sure I vapor locked and stared for a second...lol...I have a waist...pure craziness...lol...and I could see my collar bone yesterday....I haven't seen that since I was like 16....but it's there. I was laying in bed and I could see my ribs sticking out...and my hips....and all I could think was damn...that's disgusting! LMAO But I know that when I get my tuck and boob job done, it will all keep falling into place.

I weighed in this morning and I weigh 191.2. So I'm down .2 lbs. That's cool! Especially with the amount of weights I've been lifting and the amount of CRAP I've been eating...LOLOL

Oh well...til next time :)

BIG DAY!!

SW: 281.8

CW: 191.4

WOOOOHOOOOO!! Today marks the day that I've lost 90 lbs!!! SWEEEEET! February 6th, was my 8 month anniversary and I'm super excited to hit this milestone so close to that date....because that was my goal....YAY!

These past few weeks have been so trying for us....Jaxon has been bullied at school...I found out that some people I've called friends didn't think the same thing about me...and well, it sucks when you call one of the most important people in your life for guidance and they don't pick up their phone or call you back....so...my goal for today....don't cry. My son gets his emotional side from me....I'm not ashamed to admit that....I wear my heart on my sleeve and admit when I'm wrong and apologize only when I mean it. So yeah....what a week.

But here's to a new day! It may just be a number, but those numbers are my goals....:)

Hope everyone has a great week! It's almost the weekend!! :)

SW: 281.8

CW: 193

Lost 1.2 lbs this week!

Had a GREAT week! and an AMAZING weekend!!! I take my stateboard test on Thursday! HOLY COW! So excited!! :D

NSV...(non scale victory)

So I've gone to the gym the past two days in a row...I guess I pulled something last night because I can barely move today....so I took a super hot soaker bath this morning and I layed down in the tub and I went all the way under the water....WHAT!?!?.....For those of you who are battling the bulge, you can totally understand my excitement!!!! I can see that I don't really have very much fat left in my stomach...it's all just loose skin! Cause it doesn't float like my boobs do...LMAO

HOLY SMOKES! What an amazing feeling!! Just wanted to share :)

wow.

WOOT WOOT!!

me and Brenda....I love this pic! LOLOL

Kaley, Annie, me and Lacee!

Annie and Lacee and Brenda came back just to see me on my graduation day :) I feel loved!

This is Bobby...he's my phase 3 instructor...He's one of the most amazing teachers ever...there were quite a few great teachers at Milan... I'll miss them all.

SW: 281.8
CW: 194.2

Almost 2 lbs this week!!! 1.8 to be exact!

Lots of awesome things happened this last week.

Over the weekend, did TONS of hair....fun times!

Monday: More hair...

Tuesday: shopping with Kaley!!! She held my hand on my very first "skinny" girl shopping extravaganza! Fun times....I don't think I could have done it without her...

Wednesday: Started my final week of beauty school...

Thursday: Had my appointments with the financial aid lady for exit counseling and my appt with Career Services for my portfolio and career plans. She praised me for my portfolio! That was nice :) Aubrey did my hair...and I LOVE IT!

Friday: GRADUATED Beauty School....what an amazing feeling. I've finally completed something in my life. Yeah, sure, I graduated from high school, but even then I never stuck with any of my activities through those days. I went to college...never graduated...granted moving all over the place probably didn't help much...lol...so yeah, this was a big deal for me! I got to run through the tunnel and enjoy a day with my friends. It was nice. Chance even came up to the school to see me clock out for the last time and to see my goofy run through the tunnel! I determined that I'm super tall and it's hard to run under short peoples hands...lol...but it was all worth it. I can't wait to see where my career will take me.

So yeah, it was a good week. Part of me was really sad about leaving Milan, only because I know that some of the people that I talked to, I will probably never speak to again....only on the off chance that I run into them out in public or something...lol...

I went to the gym today for the first time in a very long time. I lasted 45 minutes. Not bad!! I did 15 minutes on the elliptical and then lifted weights the other 30 minutes. My thighs and arms are like jello...lol...pretty amusing. I'm going to have to take some protein with me to the gym if I really wanna last longer...I wanted to tan after I worked out today, but I had to decide between being able to walk out the door and drive home, or lose the rest of my energy in the tanning bed. I don't have much stamina these days. It's hard to work off of 400-800 calories/day but it's getting much easier. I figure since I'm working out, I can eat a little more....more protein of course...but I have to find a way to up those calories to make it through workouts and the day. I came home and made a yummy protein shake.

1C milk
1/2 tsp cocoa
1 tsp hazelnut s/f syrup
1/2 tsp truvia
1 scoop designer whey protein powder chocolate flavor
1TBSP peanut butter
4oz. espresso blend coffee (cooled)
8-10 ice cubes.
blend it all up and enjoy!

super yummy!

This weekend I'm headed down to Long Beach for the ISSE Expo!! Hair show!! Should be fun!

Hope you all have a wonderful week! And thanks for reading! :)

This is the man that has supported me through thick and thin...literally...lol...This is the man that was waiting at the end of the tunnel with a kiss, hug and smile. He told me he was proud of me...those were the sweetest words I've heard in a long time :)

I love you

weight loss and depression.....

SW: 281.8
CW: 196.0

Lost a little over a pound this week! WOOT WOOT! Slowly but surely....I'm getting there. I love it! I'm feeling so good these days. My depression has subsided a lot. Which is a bonus. And I credit the meds I'm on for that!


Just a side note...stepping on soapbox...DON'T you EVER judge anyone who has issues with depression. It doesn't make us weird, or different or SICK! We have a mild chemical imbalance in our brains and by GOD that doesn't mean there is a DAMN thing wrong with us. It could last a month a year or for life....who knows... I feel very sorry for the people that want to judge me and others for this. At least I'm getting help for my depression....sure do wish you could get help for being such an asshole, oh wait, they don't make meds for that....cause you CHOOSE to be that way. I feel sorry for people like that. So my dear friends, if you are having issues with depression, go and get your help. There is NO shame in getting help my friends....I did it! So can you :)

Whew....I feel better...sorry bout that! LOL

I'm going shopping today for my interview apparal...lol...I graduate on Friday!!! YAYAYAYAYA!! I'm so excited to start my career! State Board on February 2nd! AHHHHHH! :-) hope you all have a wonderful week!